Karen
What attracted you to hosting when you first came to us?
I used to work with young people and families first hand, however since going into management felt that something was missing in my life and wanted to have face to face hands support again with young people.
Did you have any worries or concerns about becoming a host? What were they and once you started hosting did you find any of them a problem or how were these concerns dealt with or managed?
I have worked with young people from many backgrounds many homeless over the years and also worked with young offenders and therefore didn’t have any real worries about hosting in general. My main worry was sharing my home with young people and only having one bathroom.
What do you like best about hosting?
I love to see how young people progress in supported lodgings, having the stability to reflect and then plan ahead. If a young person leaves my home feeling more positive about life, that is the best reward I could have.
What support do you get as a host?
I feel very lucky to have had one constant supportive key worker throughout my hosting experience who is always on hand to listen when I need it and to give advice when I become stuck.
Tell me some of your most memorable moments as a host
Over lockdown and beyond I have had the privilege of being a significant person in young people’s lives to celebrate with them as they reach 18 years old. I love the feeling of being able to help make their coming of age special at a time when they may not have other stable relationships in their lives. At the weekend I met a young person who left SASH after a few months to live back with family and felt privileged that I was still able to meet up with them and celebrate their 18th birthday.
I have recently visited a couple of universities with one young person hoping to start there in September, it is something I will always remember as I feel giving them time and a stable environment has enabled them to grow and work towards their future education. During their time with me they had struggled with their college course but with support and encouragement they did not give up. I’m not sure who was more exited on that day, him or me.
A few days into lockdown in 2020 a young person aged 16 came to live with me, his relationship at home breaking down. He had never washed his own clothes or planned to make a meal. He wasn’t accustomed to washing dishes either. The weather was lovely and perfect for putting washing on the line outside however I experienced an unexpected barrier when supporting him in clothes washing. He was scared of spiders and worried about them attaching themselves to the washing line. Over the period of living here he learned more about spiders, I’d show him their webs and we talked about the reality of any risk of them hurting him. He became more and more confident in hanging his washing out and felt pride in being able to wash and dry clothes and also look after himself more physically. One day we made spaghetti bolognaise together and had a great discussion about food and nutrition. From that day he swapped his daily coca cola drink for flavoured water and to my knowledge never returned to drinking coca cola regularly.
In 2022 I had a day out with my LGBT young person, we visited Leeds Pride. We had fun planning the day together, what we would wear and how we would paint our faces. It was a memorable day out for both of us as we saw thousands of people celebrate and share their support for diversity in young people.
Is there anything you find difficult as a host? If so tell me about it and how you are/were supported with it.
At times I do struggle with lack of privacy and time to myself however have found ways to deal with this and always have a day over the week when I focus on “me time”.
What kind of things have you done to help those who stay with you? Do you still connect with them once they move on?
I have supported young people to learn practical skills, washing clothes, cooking, and getting into routines. I also feel giving a young person stability and a real connection is so important. Every young person who was in supported lodgings with me has kept in touch and I still meet up with them form time to time.
How do you work your life around being a host i.e. running a home, work, family etc?
I work full time for the local authority and therefore it is important that young people living with me have something to do with their time. I am home most evenings, and this is mainly when we spend time together watching a movie, gardening, cooking sometimes together and doing daily chores. I live alone otherwise and therefore make sure I have my own time with friends, which gives me life balance and me time which is so important I feel in being able to maintain a supportive placement.
What would you say to somebody thinking of becoming a host? Would you recommend it?
If you want to feel like you can make a difference in a young person’s life, then hosting is definitely for you. The extra money a month also helps to pay bills and is much more rewarding than getting a lodger I feel. I have found that it doesn’t really make a difference whether I have a male or female young person living with me, the most important thing is personality and understanding differences to find a way to get along.
What do you think of SASH as a service and place to volunteer as a host for?
I work for the LA and therefore could be a Supportive Lodgings provider through them however I feel the support I get from SASH is so valuable I feel I can rely on them whenever there is a problem, 24 hours a day if needed.
